I swear I’m a good boy. Okay, sometimes maybe I’m not, but it’s not all my fault. Sometimes there are just serious reasons for having to ignore the house rules.
Like the times when I snort to get my mom and dad up out of bed. There I am, all sprawled out in belly-rub position, and those two are just lying there, sawing logs. I have to remind them that this belly don’t rub itself. Sometimes I have to chew all the hard eyeballs out of my stuffed menagerie just so those little creatures won’t catch me coming when I dash in on a stealth attack. And it’s my job to sing the song of my pack when our doorbell rings. I’m just warning that somebody’s out there about to raid us.
Also, I’m a good boy when I make my mom run after me at bath time or when I steal her pen or make sure she stalks me when it’s time to put on my coat and booties for a walkie, it’s because I overheard her telling my dad she needs to lose weight, and I try hard to motivate her. When I drag my dad to where all the good pee spots are, it’s because I want to prove I haven’t broken my sniffer.
This entire year I’ve been as well-mannered as I could be. I’ve sunk my teeth into doing what my minions want me to do – well, okay, sometimes. But I super promise that I’ve also played nice with others at Dog Tired (just review my weekly report cards for proof), and I’ve run my tail off keeping peace among my friends when they get into scraps over bones and squeaky toys.
So I hope I’ve earned a Christmas wish or two this year. And my biggest wish is for you to make sure all shelter pups enjoy the best holiday ever! That means cushy warm beds, chow-filled doggy bowls, and fun moms and dads to toss balls and snuggle with. If I get my Christmas wish, I promise my tail will keep wagging joyfully all through the New Year!
Here’s toasting you with the world’s Tastiest Barktini!
Your Canine Elf,
P.S. Also, if you have an extra in your toy bag, I wouldn’t mind getting another toy that can soon join Toby’s Hospital for the Blind.